Loser

Beaver came home from school today all upset.

There have been a few small issues recently, and today they came to a head. It might be because he's got a bit of a cold and is struggling. It might be because he hasn't been sleeping well recently. it's the end of the term, and he's exhausted.

His remedial teacher has been talking to his grade teacher to change some of his homework (in essence, give him less). The kids in the class have been given their next maths book, and he has not. And we've just had the sports carnival, always a stark reminder of his difference and limited physical abilities. It may be that many of the parents and teachers and staff at school admire him for his guts to have a go, but he's acutely aware that the kids have no such insights. And like any boy, he just wants to run and win. Today the kids played soccer, and some boys did not want him in his team.

So Beaver came home in tears.

"The kids say I'm a loser".

"I don't want to be different."

"I am the slowest runner in the school".

"I don't want to have CP."

"There is nothing special about me."

"I want to do the same work as the other kids. I need some help, but I want to try to do it."

These are just some of the things that came out. Possum was doing his homework with Jess, Boo Boo was chucking a tantrum - so I took Beaver to our bedroom and had a long chat with him.

I told him that, yes, he was the slowest runner in the school. But also the bravest.

I told him that maybe he wasn't great at soccer, but he's a good actor.

I explained to him that CP is part of his life, and we have to find a way to live with it. That everyone is different, and we all need to work out what we're good at in life. We discussed maybe trying some special needs soccer. Or maybe another sports, like archery or something that the CP Sport and Recreation Association offers. And I promised him that I'd have a talk with his teacher about the homework issue, and that maybe we can do his special homework and then I can help him with the other. I explained to him that our upcoming appointment with the Physical Disability Clinic specialist is to help him manage the effects of his CP, and to make living with it easier. And that it will not ever go away, as the doctors have not found a medicine to make it disappear. But they are trying to find one, and in the meantime, we have to just live life as well as we can, and do what we can, and try, and enjoy life, and be happy.

I told him that he was special in my eyes, because I love him very much.

And I told him that his CP was not his fault. At which he looked at me in total and utter surprise. I told him that it was mum and dad's fault, because when we made him, we made him with his deep dark eyes, his thick hair and his CP. It had never occurred to him that having CP might not be his fault! Oh God! Poor lad!

How could I have missed making that point clear to him earlier !?!

Run boy run

We had fun at the school sports carnival today.

We are not a sporty type of family, but we do enjoy a good laugh. Possum was very worried about not winning any races. Beaver was a bit dejected knowing he would win no races. So this morning I talked a lot about how everyone has different strengths, about the fun of participating, the courage of taking part even if you can't win, and having fun, and about entertaining the audience if you know you're going to loose anyway.

So come race time, Beaver ran. He ran the 50 meters

and then he ran some more. He ran the 100 meters

And, believe it or not, he then ran the 400 meters.

I was so stunned to see him in that race that I forgot to push the "record" button on my video camera!

Pretty soon into the race, Beaver lost puff. I ran towards him, and got there just when he had to stop because of a stitch. I lifted him on my back, and together we finished the race!

In the mother's relay race, our team was one person down, so in the end I had to run twice. Needless to say we didn't win.

But we had fun.

Tomorrow, I will post some footage of the egg and spoon race, where you will see all three children take a starring role...

Rare Moment

All three kids - and even Charlie bird - playing together....

Tooth Trouble

I'm sorry about the silence here - I've been having some teeth trouble.

I had to have two wisdom teeth on my left pulled two weeks ago (wasn't a very nice experience) and while the top one healed fine, I managed to loose the blood clot in the bottom one after Possum accidentally whacked me in the face while we were playing, and I ended up with a nasty case of dry socket. It basically means that there is a hole where the tooth was, with the bone exposed. And the whole thing is now healing much slower than if there had been a blood clot protecting the bone and providing a structure to heal around. Awww. This is not funny, and seriously hurts.

The only up-side (well, sort of) is that I've been off in la-la land and legally high for the last week. I've had to take high levels of panadene and codeine, and got through this last week in a daze of pain and drugs. I don't think I was a very nice or responsive person to live with ...

Anyway, today is the first day I have managed to come out of the fog. Phew. Now I have some bills to pay, load of e-mails to reply to - and then some blog posts to write!

Can't wait to get that last remaining wisdom tooth out - NOT !!!!

Awards

Who's a lucky girl then!

This week, I have been given two blog awards.

The first award came from TherExtras. This award for excellence in the expression of values in a blog! How is that for a great award! Mind you, it needs some serious thinking on my part before I pass it on. The rules of this award (posted in the comments section) state that I need to share 6 values that are important to me, and 6 that I don't like before I pass the award on. Hmm. Ready?

Values that are important to me: Inclusiveness, tolerance, environmentalism, generosity of spirit, staightforwardness and helping kindness.

What I don't like is: intolerance, discrimination, hypocracy, greediness, selfishness and any form of trying to impose values on others

That all sounds a big grand and serious, doesn't it?

The second award I received this week is called "Sharing the Love" was kindly given to me by Mommy-Dearest over at The Quirk Factor.

The award is for blogs that you love, that uplift you. You know, the blogs that everyone should read, so you want to share the love? It's very nice to receive an award like this, and to know that there is some person out there in the bloggosphere that likes what I write! Especially from someone whose blog I love!

The trouble with these blog awards is, though, that you're supposed to pass them on. I don't know that many bloggers, though, and those that I do know are such "big" bloggers that it feels like an intrusion to give them an award. Wil lthey not think it too cheeky of little old me? Will they have the time to pass the award on? Will they get annoyed that I'm bothering them?

So, I feel very pleased with my awards, but slightly awkward at the same time...

But still, rules are rules (although I'm going to cheat a little and hand out only three awards each).

I bestow the values award to Equal Not Special, Terrible Palsy and Chewing the Fat of course.

And the "Sharing the Love" will have to go to Life with Ben, Hey Dad and a blog written in Afrikaans called Windpompe en Vygies. No doubt about that either.

Called to the Teacher

I took the boys to school.

Possum's drop off was straightforward, he blew me a kiss and ran off with his best friend. Beaver however still likes to be taken to his class.

When we got there his class teacher, Mrs. D., called me over from the other end of the playground.

"Mrs. Fabig" she shouted, "I would like to have a quick word with you before you go!"

Oh dear, what's happened? I thought as Mrs. D. came striding over.

Mrs. D. asked Beaver to join us, and off we went to his desk. She winked at Beaver and pulled out his Scripture book.

"I really wanted to show you this" And she opened the last page in the book. I looked at it blankly. Some Year 1 kid had written some lines about "a time to live and a time to die". So?

Then Mrs. D. told me in a proud voice that it was in fact Beaver who had written these clearly recognisable words. He had copied them from the blackboard in the same time as the other children. The words were clear and well formed. They were good. Very good. In fact, according to Mrs. D. some of Beaver's class mates in his little scripture discussion group clapped spontaneously when they noticed how well Beaver had written his words.

Beaver looked mightily pleased with himself.

Mrs. D. was proud as punch.

She turned around with slightly watery eyes and gave me a big hug.

"It's happening" she said. "He's got it, it's happening. His writing is really getting there."

Mrs. D. was proud as punch.

I was proud as punch.